It's that magical time again. The sequins are in place. The euro-beats are queued up. Somewhere, Terry Wogan is sitting in front of his TV with a large whisky. We're ready for... Eurovision.

11.34pm
Well, it's all over. It's been a wonderful night – a night of many, many outfits and very little style. We couldn't have asked for anything more. Scroll down and start from the bottom for the full story. 

11.30pm
CONCHITAAAAAAAAAA! Austria wins! 

11.25pm 
Another over-enthusiastic hairband. It's a European epidemic. Carmen Miranda springs to mind.

11.15pm
The Norwegian presenter almost couldn't be with us tonight, because she's currently filming her role as an evil newsreader in the next Hunger Games.

11.05pm
This was a bad decision, Belarus. Hello, Cressida Bonas at a festival:

10.55pm
The audience are booing the presenter from Russia, which seems unkind. Guess they don't like that cowl-neck. It is a bit 1998.

10.40pm
Back in the good old days, this would be about the time that Terry Wogan started slurring his words and bitching that the Scandinavian countries always vote tactically. We miss you Tezza.

10.35pm
Clearly Molly is as confused as we are by the cake gift from the Disney-princess lady.

10.15pm
Oh my god – who invited David Bowie from The Neverending Story?

10pm
Quite satisfied with our girl Molly's costume. Nice balance of fancy-dress elements, including lots of feathers, some faux tattoos and a weird head thing.

Graham Norton really doesn't like the Danish Disney princess presenter. We're still enjoying these two though, with their suits and their cheeky Euro banter.

9.55pm
Pretty sure San Marino wasn't a real place when Terry Wogan used to present this. It's not ringing any bells.

9.52pm
First of all, the Netherlands' song is actually really good. Secondly, doesn't she look like Robin Wright in her Forrest Gump days?

9.50pm
Denmark doesn't want to win because they can't afford to host it two years in a row. Fair enough. But come on, man, put your bow-tie on properly. That's just manners.

9.40pm
Hungary is staring so intensely into the camera, it feels like he's trying to get off with us. He's got Hungary eyes, if you will. Sorry.

Also, seriously, enough with the men wearing plain black. 

9.36pm
I think I saw Switzerland guy in Covent Garden last week, juggling while riding a unicycle.

9.35pm
Spain has a LOT of wet-look gel in her hair and keeps screaming "Daaaaaaaaan-ciiiiiing iiiiin THE RAIN! THE RAAIN!". What's this one called again?

9.30pm
Poland did a bit of a striptease earlier, but has anyone yet ripped off a skirt/pair of trousers/anything else that can be secured with velcro? Don't think so. It's sorely overdue. To lift everyone's spirits, here's a handy compilation of the best costume changes in Eurovision history:

9.20pm
This Halloween, Italy has come as a slutty I, Claudius.

9.15pm
Trust Russia to freak everyone the **** out.

Two girls, one ponytail? BURN THEM. THEY'RE WITCHES.

9.10pm
You know how we're always going on about how French people are just innately chic and perennially stylish?

Yeah, someone's just ruined that whole thing.

9.05pm
Sweden's got that strand-y, piece-y hair thing going on, like Sarah Harding of Girls Aloud circa 2002. We used to spend ages with 'sculpting wax' trying to get our hair to do that.

8.55pm
The thing is, Conchita from Austria can actually sing, as well as rocking the whole beard/fishtail Oscar gown look. It's sort of like Celine Dion at the end of Titanic, but just slightly more likely to give you stubble rash.

8.50pm
What. The. Hell... are Poland doing? Whatever it is, it's really livened things up.

8.45pm
A strong start for Montenegro with an actual figure skater. Then, alas, another bloke in a suit.

8.40pm
Despite Romania's strong entry, so far things are really yet to get going. Armenia's entry is really very underwhelming. He's literally not wearing anything shiny or sparkly, and there's no dancing or even a trapeze. Nil points!

8.35pm
This is more like it! Romania have really brought that weird, pounding Euro vibe to proceedings. And there is nothing not to love about this lady:

8.30pm
Oh GOOD, Norway have sent in David Brent and he's got both his ears pierced.

8.25pm
Azerbaijan's entry is very glam. That dress is a bit Marchesa, no? Literally no idea what the trapeze stuff is all about.

8.20pm
Ukraine was more notable for the hamster wheel antics than the costume, which had a sort of sexy witch vibe. Now we have the Belarus boys looking and sounding very much like a Euro version of Boyzone.

8.15pm

Austria’s entry looks exactly how I do in my new magnifying fluro-lit bathroom mirror. pic.twitter.com/bo2mNTuCD5 #Eurovision

— Grace Dent (@gracedent) May 10, 2024

8.10pm
'Well, this all seems a bit unnecessary' – we're loving Graham Norton's commentary already. Does anyone else think it's bizarre that Kasper from Borgen is presenting the event in Denmark? Nevertheless, he looks hot.

The female presenter is dressed like a Disney princess.

8pm
We'll be watching and live-blogging throughout the evening, from the very first flash of disco lighting to the final celebratory moments. We'll be paying special attention to the costumes and hoping for the kind of Eurovision fashion gold that we've seen in yesteryear. Who can forget Sheeba, Ireland's 1981 entry, in their matching superhero outfits?

Or Svetlana Loboda, Ukraine's low-key entry from 2009?

Follow me at @hattiehattie